HOW TO BE A FIT MOM Fit moms lead to fit kids by Michele Batz When it comes to running a household, there are a series of tasks that are never finished because they must be done over and over again. Vacuuming the floor, cleaning the bathrooms, doing the laundry, buying groceries, cooking, making lunches, taking out the garbage, and mowing the lawn are all chores that need to be done on a day-to-day or week-to-week basis. At the beginning of a relationship, people fall into a routine for getting these tasks done. Usually, if one person is staying at home, he or she assumes the majority of the domestic tasks. If both partners work, the tasks should be evenly divided. But quite often, during the course of a relationship, the division becomes unbalanced, with one person doing more than the other. This imbalance evolves for a number of reasons. One person may experience a temporary increase in workload, leading the other to take over some of their tasks. When a woman goes on maternity leave she may assume almost all of the household tasks and take care of the new baby. When she returns to work outside the home, she may continue to do most household jobs. If either partner is laid off or has a sabbatical, he or she may assume a larger role at home, which persists even after the return to work. LACK OF COMMUNICATION This imbalance is usually not a deliberate effort to avoid doing a fair share, but rather is the result of a lack of communication between partners. If chores are split unevenly in your household, you need to work to re-establish balance. What you do inside the household is usually a reflection of how your parents divided up household tasks. It is important to understand your partner's background before you try to balance the workload. How is this done? Talk with your partner in a non-confrontational manner. The best way to gain cooperation is to write up a list of all the household duties, inside and out and start by saying, "I need your help. I am having a hard time getting everything done." Take out your list. Ask your partner what he or she expects of you, and then tell your partner what you need from him or her. Go over the list and ask which tasks your partner prefers doing. Do this same process with your children. If you do this, you will increase your self-esteem. Being able to express your wishes and avoiding situations that cause you stress will enhance your well-being. If you do this, you will also have time for yourself, instead of doing all the chores! Most of us have time in our schedules to exercise and eat properly if we manage our time correctly. Are you willing to make changes in your life to get the time? Change can be difficult, especially for people who are used to pleasing others and putting their own needs last. When you are constantly called on to fix other people's problems, you help neither yourself nor them in the long run. They will never have to face the consequences of their poor planning, and you will never be able to reach your goals. Ten Steps to Success: 1. Establish your priorities and make appointments with yourself in your day planner. 2. Highlight tasks or appointments in your day planner that you must be complete that day, including eating properly and exercising. 3. Look for ways to incorporate more exercise into your daily routine. Every little bit counts. 4. Take walks and go for bicycle rides with your kids. Make goals to do a fun run or 5-K. 5. Get your schools involved and have an after-school program. All you need is a space to run with some hip music. 6. Don't feel pressured into saying yes, if you are not sure how a task will affect the rest of your schedule. 7. Identify your own personal time thieves and evaluate why you say yes to their repeated demands for your time. 8. Write a list of everything that needs to be done outside and inside the home. Have a family meeting to discuss the household duties and allow others to choose what tasks they want to do each week. 9. Post the list and review it regularly. 10. Do not revert to completing other people's tasks unless there is a specific reason to do so and they are made aware of your help. Michele Batz is a physical education teacher at Kenneth Murphy in Beach Park, IL. Her e-mail address is mbatz78@hotmail.com. She is also the author of the book What Is Holding You Back? available at nightengalepress.com or amazon.com Privacy Policy of Kids Running